Am Not a Superwoman: How to Drop the Cape and Live Fully

Are You Carrying Too Much?

Have you ever looked in the mirror and felt exhausted—not just physically but deep in your spirit? Have you found yourself smiling when you wanted to cry, saying “yes” when every bone in your body was screaming “no”? Do you carry everyone’s problems like a badge of honor, hoping someone will notice and applaud you for being “strong”?

If you nodded along, you’re not alone. Women across the world have been raised to believe we must be everything to everyone—perfect wives, perfect mothers, perfect professionals, perfect friends—while quietly breaking under the weight of unrealistic expectations.

This is not just a lifestyle; it’s a trap. And today, we are breaking free.

The Superwoman Myth

The “superwoman” mindset was built on the idea that we can and must do it all. Sociologist Marjorie Hansen Shaevitz coined the term in her 1984 book The Superwoman Syndrome to describe women who stretch themselves to breaking point, trying to excel in every area of life simultaneously.

Author Brené Brown writes,

> “When perfectionism is driving, shame is always riding shotgun—and fear is the annoying backseat driver.” (The Gifts of Imperfection)

Carrying the superwoman mindset often stems from fear—fear of being seen as lazy, weak, or unworthy. We overcompensate. We hustle. We neglect rest. But living this way is not strength; it is self-abandonment.

In her book Burnout, Emily Nagoski writes:

> “You are not here to be endlessly selfless. You are here to be fully, gloriously human.”

That statement is revolutionary. It reminds us that our value is not measured by how much we sacrifice but by how authentically we live.

Why You Must Let Go of the Cape

Being a “superwoman” seems noble, but it slowly erodes joy. It leaves women feeling disconnected from their desires, resentful of their relationships, and burned out in their careers.

Glennon Doyle puts it plainly in Untamed:

> “When a woman finally learns that pleasing the world is impossible, she becomes free to learn how to please herself.”

You deserve a life that feels good, not one that merely looks good from the outside.

How to Fall in Love with Being You

Falling in love with yourself is the first step to breaking free from the superwoman mindset. Here’s how:

1. Get Honest About Your Limits

Admit what you can and cannot do. Stop glamorizing exhaustion. Rest is not laziness—it is fuel.

2. Ask Yourself What You Actually Want

Instead of moving on autopilot, take a pause. What do you want to feel every day—peace, excitement, security? Align your choices with those desires.

3. Let People Help You

Being strong does not mean doing it all. True strength is knowing when to receive.

4. Take Up Space

Stop shrinking to make others comfortable. Speak your truth, even when your voice shakes.

5. Celebrate Your Humanity

You are allowed to make mistakes, change your mind, and take breaks. You are allowed to just be.

How to Love Deeply and Respect Your Life

Loving deeply does not mean losing yourself. It means being fully present with others without abandoning who you are.

Set Boundaries: Love thrives in safety. Boundaries protect your energy and keep resentment at bay.

Prioritize Your Body: Sleep, eat, and move like someone whose life depends on it—because it does.

Be Authentic in Relationships: Drop the mask. Real love grows where there is realness.

Say No Without Guilt: Every “no” to something draining is a “yes” to your peace.

Celebrate Small Joys: Make room for pleasure. Joy keeps your spirit alive.

Five Affirmations to Anchor You

1. I am worthy, even when I rest.

2. My value is not measured by how much I do but by who I am.

3. I choose peace over perfection.

4. I allow love and support into my life.

5. I honor my body, my emotions, and my limits.

Call to Action

It’s time to take off the cape. You were never meant to be a superwoman—you were meant to be a whole woman. Whole, rested, alive, and present.

Take one small action today: say no to something that drains you, ask for help, cancel an obligation you no longer enjoy, or simply sit quietly with yourself and breathe.

Your life is too precious to be lived on autopilot. Choose you.

And if you need a guide to help you unlearn the pressure and rediscover your joy, I invite you to work with me. Together, we can rewrite your story and create a life that feels aligned, fulfilling, and beautifully human.